September 21, 2008
It is Sunday, which around our house frequently means it is the busiest day of the week, especially for my son Spencer. He is much in demand in the small community church that we attend, whether for his boy soprano voice or for his dramatic reading skills. He also sings traditional Anglican music in a choir, the Valley Forge Choir of Men and Boys, whose performances are mostly on Sunday afternoons. Some days, like today, he spends the morning performing in one way or another at one church, comes home for a few minutes to eat and change, and goes out again to another church to sing for a few more hours.
Spence always says that he does not like to be so busy. He would prefer doing one activity or another, but not both. He seems to have an inborn sense of moderation, of how much activity is too much in one day. He, like his mother, is of a more contemplative nature.
Over the years I have sometimes tried to cajole him into a more active schedule than he would prefer. I have found it difficult, however, to counter his arguments that "Mom, that is too many things to do in one day" when it is clear that at 14, he knows himself and his limitations.
The aphorism "Know Thyself" was inscribed in the courtyard of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi; it is variously attributed to a number of ancient philosophers, usually Socrates. Once again, our old Greek friends were on to something. Throughout my life, and more and more as I have reached the frantic years of middle age, I have overscheduled myself to my own chagrin, ignoring my own unacknowledged yearning to say "no" and slow down. I can tell when I am too busy because my usual sang-froid is replaced by increasing crankiness and irritability; the air around me crackles with lightning; and the dog flees to his crate.
Self-awareness is key to living a moderate lifestyle. For some people, like me, awareness of my own needs only comes gradually after half a lifetime; others, like Spencer, seem to have been born with it (and I can't even take credit for it coming from me).
In recent years, I have become interested in the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, which to my limited understanding means living in the now, rather than the future or the past. From what I have read, practicing mindfulness can help a person gain self-awareness. Over the next year, I hope to explore this concept more to understand how it can be helpful in living a life of moderation and balance.
It is Sunday, which around our house frequently means it is the busiest day of the week, especially for my son Spencer. He is much in demand in the small community church that we attend, whether for his boy soprano voice or for his dramatic reading skills. He also sings traditional Anglican music in a choir, the Valley Forge Choir of Men and Boys, whose performances are mostly on Sunday afternoons. Some days, like today, he spends the morning performing in one way or another at one church, comes home for a few minutes to eat and change, and goes out again to another church to sing for a few more hours.
Spence always says that he does not like to be so busy. He would prefer doing one activity or another, but not both. He seems to have an inborn sense of moderation, of how much activity is too much in one day. He, like his mother, is of a more contemplative nature.
Over the years I have sometimes tried to cajole him into a more active schedule than he would prefer. I have found it difficult, however, to counter his arguments that "Mom, that is too many things to do in one day" when it is clear that at 14, he knows himself and his limitations.
The aphorism "Know Thyself" was inscribed in the courtyard of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi; it is variously attributed to a number of ancient philosophers, usually Socrates. Once again, our old Greek friends were on to something. Throughout my life, and more and more as I have reached the frantic years of middle age, I have overscheduled myself to my own chagrin, ignoring my own unacknowledged yearning to say "no" and slow down. I can tell when I am too busy because my usual sang-froid is replaced by increasing crankiness and irritability; the air around me crackles with lightning; and the dog flees to his crate.
Self-awareness is key to living a moderate lifestyle. For some people, like me, awareness of my own needs only comes gradually after half a lifetime; others, like Spencer, seem to have been born with it (and I can't even take credit for it coming from me).
In recent years, I have become interested in the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, which to my limited understanding means living in the now, rather than the future or the past. From what I have read, practicing mindfulness can help a person gain self-awareness. Over the next year, I hope to explore this concept more to understand how it can be helpful in living a life of moderation and balance.
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